Stella Goddard

BA (Hons) Counselling
Registered and Accredited Counsellor BACP, Registered and Accredited Counsellor ACC,
Registered Accredited Professional NCPS
Recognised Registered and Accredited Counsellor with Bupa, Aviva and Cigna

Are your anxiety levels rising due to feeling stuck?

We all know that life is complex and is not linear. Every day we are faced with multiple stressors personally and professionally. The media certainly does not help with it’s seemingly never ending stream of bad news. It can be difficult to navigate our way through each day and bring some kind of order out of the chaos into our lives.

When our senses are bombarded with bad news we can become overwhelmed with anxiety and then become immobilized and stuck. Our brains may go into survival mode – fight, flight, freeze. When we are in this place we can feel even more stressed and worried about how to deal with the decisions we need to make.

I wonder if any of the following scenarios resonate with you?

Have you found yourself making snap decisions because you’re in a state of panic and then found that you have made the wrong decisions which leads to further anxiety and stress?

Do you feel pressurised by other people to make decisions even when you’re not ready and don’t know what you would like to do?

Have you ended up in a loop of repeating behaviour – thinking something is a good decision – trying it – hating it – escaping from it – feeling defeated and ashamed and vowing never to do that again. Then in a few months time – you repeat the same behaviour and then end up feeling angry, low and stuck because you don’t seem to be moving forward. It can seem as though you are going round in circles and feeling that you can’t get anything right. The impact of this on your self-esteem and relationships can be profound – leading to arguments, breakdown in communication and more.

It may seem as though there is no escape from this revolving door of unhelpful way of being. Thankfully there is a way out but there are a number of foundational things that need to be in place to be able to work through the issues.

I would suggest that it is vital to be honest about where we actually are rather than being lost in wishful thinking. It may be difficult to accept the truth of our situation. However, it will give us a realistic place to start thinking about what we do know and what one step we might be able to take to go forward.

Here are some questions to reflect on that may helpful in making good decisions for yourself –

How am I right now?

What do I need right now that would be helpful?

What is the most important thing right now?

What one step can I/will I take to help myself?

You may need the support of a Counsellor to help you reflect on, process and find coping strategies for the situation you find yourself in. It takes courage to ask for help and support and is a sign of strength not weakness.